The first vacation is an important milestone for a newly established couple. It’s an opportunity to shut out the rest of the world and concentrate on your relationship. That precious time together can strengthen a couple and confirm their feelings for one another, or it can highlight differences that may turn out to be deal breakers.
Keep It Neutral
One of the best things about a new relationship is that it opens up worlds you never knew existed. Perhaps your sweetie likes hockey, and you’ve never watched a game before. Or maybe she’s an art aficionado, and you’ve never set foot in a gallery.
These revelations can be fun and exciting, and there’s a place for them on your first trip. Just be sure that the entire trip does not revolve around activities well suited for one of you but not the other.
Skiing won’t bring you closer together if one of you is hitting the moguls while the other’s in beginner class. You won’t even be riding the same lift. The advanced skier may enjoy showing off his prowess, but his partner may feel left in the…powder.
Choose Activities You Can Do Together
You don’t have to be joined at the hip, but the first vacation is more than just another trip, it’s an important opportunity to deepen your relationship. Plan to spend a good chunk of every day together. Go sight seeing or hang out at the beach.
If it all works out, she’ll be sick of seeing you every day in a few years, and will be only too glad to have you go fishing all day and leave her at the hotel in peace. But the first vacation is where you form the bond that makes her want you back at the end of the day.
Keep Your Expectations in Check
A good rule of thumb is: assume your romantic get away will be somewhat less fabulous than it has been in your imagination all the weeks you’ve been planning it.
It’s easy to build up a lot of unrealistic expectations. Remember you want to walk away from this experience feeling good, not disappointed.
When you find yourself imagining your companion reading your mind, anticipating your wants, and being completely in sync with you on every decision to be made, ask yourself “what’s really likely to happen?”
Be prepared to compromise, communicate and accept the fact that not everything will be perfect – and that’s o.k.
Lower the Pressure
Don’t forget that this is supposed to be fun! There’s no need to analyze every word your partner says, or fret over the things that go wrong (you can’t change them anyway).
If the trip goes smoothly, you’ll have a great time and come home with renewed enthusiasm for your relationship. If there are bumps in the road, you’ll get to see how your partner handles these challenges and come home with some funny stories.
If your relationship ends because of one vacation, it wasn’t strong enough for the long haul anyway.
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