Billions will watch the TV broadcast of the Winter Olympics in Sochi, making the affair almost as popular as “Duck Dynasty.”
But not all events are equally loved. Ice hockey and figure skating attract large stadium crowds.
Other venues seem to draw lone spectators who wander in, hoping to snag a free wireless connection.
But all is not lost. With a little tweaking, many events may be made more exciting to watch.
Here are a few suggestions:
Curling may be made immediately more exciting by adding dogs to the mix.
Dogs love to chase brooms!
I can’t sweep my garage without my Lab grabbing at the whisk end and trying to bring me down.
The same will work at the Olympics. As the stone glides down the ice, release a Siberian Husky.
Watch the pooch seize the bristles and get in a tug of war with the sweeper. Pulling and tugging may cause the Olympian to take a bad spill and possibly incur an injury.
But when the winner hobbles to the podium to receive a metal, you’ll know he or she earned it.
You’ve all seen it. The sled hurls down the slope at light speed with the Olympian lying down, arms firmly at side, as if wearing a straight jacket.
How could this be more exciting?
Have the competitor wear an actual straight jacket. Audiences love a good escape artist.
The ride down the track could be thrilling to watch as the Olympian writhes and wriggles to gain freedom. If the bottom is reached without escape, points will be deducted.
And an unflattering tweet will undoubtedly be made.
Should the event gain popularity, handcuffs and a Chinese Water Torture Cell may be added.
Ice Dancing With The Fish
With the huge popularity of figure skating, ice dancing needs to set itself apart.
Incorporating fishing into the mix may do the trick.
Small holes could be cut into the ice where participants drop in a line and get points for catching a northern pike, yellow perch, or bluegill.
Imagine the cheers when a competitor does a triple axel, then reels in a walleye.
It may introduce a whole new segment of people to the sport.
Who knows, the Winter Olympics may one day be more popular than “Duck Dynasty.”
See you at the games!