As much as I hate to say it, it’s time that we let go of the romantic notions and start to look at the absolute truth. The fact of the matter is that most relationships just don’t last. I’m looking at the cold hard reality of that after being with the person who I called my soul mate for five and a half years and them having left– and they won’t even return my calls. Just what is a prenup, and what does it entail; and does it really kill the “magic” of your wedding day?
The Likelihood of Divorce
While the divorce rate is dropping, it was still at 36% in 2010. No matter how rosy your outlook on things, those numbers have to make you think. On my twitter feed alone though, I see a lot of quotes about “the one” floating around that tell me that a lot of people just don’t get this. Human beings have a short memory and have a very narrow view of the events of the past, forgetting that there was a time when a woman could not divorce her husband, and would be punished by law for trying to flee an unhappy marriage! Those divorce numbers aren’t looking so scary now, are they?
A history of marriage
More importantly, it seems that people are forgetting the original purpose of the institution of marriage in the first place. The nature of marriage is a hot topic these days, but almost no one seems to identify it as it was originally intended: As a business contract between two men in order to benefit each other’s family’s futures. Up until even the 1800’s, women were married off in decisions made by their father and a man, or that man’s father in order to solidify family friendships and therefore political gain. To marry into a richer family was always a plus. If you go even further back, you find that marriages did in fact exist before even biblical history claims it, and have done so in many cultures. The practice of marrying only for love is relatively new, and it was once said that a man who loved only his wife (having mistresses was perfectly acceptable and normal) was truly boring.
The Long and Short of it:
If the topic of a prenup comes up, don’t shut down the conversation right away. Stop and remember that you are in fact, entering a contract anyway– wouldn’t it be better to have a more fine tuned say in what was written in that contract? Especially if you are a woman; you have rights that your ancestors quite simply did not: exercise them!
More information on prenuptiual agreements and what they entail