When I met my husband, everything about him seemed just right, until I asked him about his work. He told me he managed a mortuary. Euwwww!
I decided to get curious. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. I am grateful to the women who declined to date him because he deals with (gasp!) death for a living. They saved him for me. I have met many other funeral directors since then, and they have all been lovely people. Here’s why they make great husbands (or wives) :
Funeral Directors know how to be calm, no matter what.
Imagine dealing with bereaved, hysterical people all day. My husband loves his job. He enjoys helping people get through one of the worst times in their lives to emerge on the other side of it. After doing that all day, my two teenagers are no problem! After seven years, I can count on the fingers of one hand the times I’ve seen my spouse get really upset.
Funeral Directors appreciate life.
Death is part of life, and most of us would rather not think about it. When I met my husband, I had just completed treatment for a very aggressive cancer. I was still in that first high risk period when my cancer could recur. He proposed anyway. I asked him if he would still want to get married if my upcoming scans were not great. He said, “What would change?”
According to him, we all suffer from a terminal illness. It’s called life. “Everyone who was born in 1880 has died. Most people who were born in 1920 have died too. We’re looking for a cure, but there isn’t one.” He made me laugh. Being fully aware of the fact of death can make you more deeply appreciate every moment.
He’ll never be out of a job.
As long as people live, they will also die. Someone has to help families say goodbye. You may find death a disturbing subject, but when it happens to someone you love, you will appreciate the person who holds your hand and gets you through the grief and the details. Most of the funeral directors I have met consider it a ministry. They are some of the kindest, most generous people I know.
There are a few disadvantages.
Forget leaving town for Christmas and Thanksgiving. Not only will you not be able to go anywhere, but you’ll hardly see him. You also will have to learn to go back to sleep after he’s been called at 3:00 a.m., since death doesn’t keep banker’s hours.
His gallows humor might make you roll your eyes.
If the person who has captured your interest is a Funeral Director, don’t run! Give him a chance. He may surprise you.
More from Elizabeth Danu:
What to do For Your Child’s Growing Pains
A Day in the Life of a Hospital Massage Therapist
How Controlling Inflammation Can Halt Cancer