I am not quite sure where it comes from. Maybe it’s because you come from a big family. Maybe because you don’t like doing things on your own. Maybe it all has to do with not feeling enough? Maybe we are wired not to be alone after all.
So many times you catch yourself imagining prolonged futuristic perspective with a certain person you met. You had a great time, shared common interests and opinions, smiled and laughed. All the good emotions stirred up instant illusion of doing things together in the future. Next thing you know, you hit the brick wall. It’s not what you expected from that person. Your made-up plans crumble as other person doesn’t return the favor. You start questioning yourself “What did I do wrong?” or “I thought we liked each other a lot!” or “Am I loosing my mind by thinking friendly people always want to be my friends?” or “Do I get attached too easily?” On the other hand, for women specifically, meeting a man who seems suitable, fire of imagination of living and doing things together explodes between your eyes! When you think about it, it sounds absurd. But, isn’t it wired reproduction and survival mechanism that dictates this urge to “see the plan” ?
Where does one draw the line to understand, that not all people who are good to us will stay in our lives ? Repetition is the master of habit, skills and relationships. Friend is not a passerby, but somebody who walks and looks in same direction as you. If the person is not returning the favor of same level of willingness, it`s point blank that you aren’t on the same frequency. Because, if that’s not in your heart it will not happen. Chemistry, attraction, dislikes are instant actions. If a person has an urge for this newly discovered “element” he will effortlessly follow the path it sparked. Doesn`t matter if you are introvert or an extrovert ; if you like what you see and love how it makes you feel and aren`t a fool. You will not loose the sight of such person or thing in your life. Goodness is our most addictive drug. Happiness is what makes us do what we do throughout our lives. There is no other way about it.
So next time when you catch yourself imagining – how this or that new person could be implemented in your life – Stop Yourself! Take a deep breath and lay hand on your heart. Close your eyes and smile. Tel yourself : “I am enough! I will accept this person`s decision to be more or less in my life no matter the outcome.I can offer them my friendship and what they do about it is unquestionable from my part. I am at peace and happy with myself. I am enough and can do anything with or without them.” Believe that you are the best person for yourself. Enjoy your own company. Be open minded. Those who are meant to be in your life will always be there. Everything else is leaves in the wind.
Stay happy my friend!