I was younger than she was. She was already a mother, and I had not fathered a child. We wanted a child together. There would one major obstacle; her tubes were tied, so we thought it would be so easy as to untie them. We quickly made an appointment with her OBGYN doctor to ask what types of options we would have to get pregnant. Then we started our journey of hopes, shattered dreams, and miracles.
After our first doctor visit, we quickly realized that we needed to really sit down and talk about the serious nature of what we were trying to do. Untying her tubes would mean surgery and a possible reduction by 20 or more percent of my wife’s fertility. This would mean I needed to be rather strong in that department, which was not even a thought for me. I was young, strong, and healthy. Per the doctor’s orders, he recommended I get checked before doing any surgery on my wife, to make sure we would have the best possible environment on both sides to increase our chance of getting pregnant. Our hopes were high, we thought one more test, and we will be on our way. As it turned out, I would fail the test. I had a low sperm count, low functional sperm count, and my chances of getting anyone pregnant were slim to none. Given my Wife’s condition on top of mine, our chances were literally impossible to conceive without a miracle. We were not ready to give up just yet, so we searched and studied procedures and doctors who specialized in these areas near our home.
We discovered In-Vitro Fertilization. We thought it was worth exploring. After a consultation, things were looking up. We were perfect subjects for the process. There would be no need to untie tubes, and the doctors would pick the only few good quality sperm I could produce, fertilize my Wife’s best quality eggs with it, and we would be on our way. We were excited and enrolled ourselves in the process. Then we were hit with the price. I was slapped by depression…again. I did not have $30,000 to spend, and was not making enough money to support a loan that big. Then we found out in the state of Hawaii insurance will pay in full one time for people suffering from infertility such as myself. We were finally getting somewhere. The process was long, with many doctor visits and sacrifices to get it right. We failed. They implanted two of our very best embryos, and we did not get pregnant. We had four embryos left, three of fair quality and one of poor quality. We tried another cycle with two fair embryos, and we failed again. I was at the end of my rope. I gave up. I felt like I could not meet my wife and the doctors half way due to weakness to make it happen.
My wife, ever determined to use the last two embryos we had left, of fair and poor quality, found another IVF doctor. I did not want to do it. I could not go through another failure. My wife enrolled us anyway, without my knowledge. When I found out, I couldn’t be upset; she was still fighting when I gave up for the two of us. I reluctantly agreed to try one more time, but this would be the last time. We entered the exhausting process of shots, medicines, and tests. She got pregnant from less than good quality embryos! We went to our first ultrasound, wondering if it was a boy or a girl. The doctor turned the screen toward us and said, “And then there were two.” The poor quality embryo was growing also! Today I am the proud father of twins, a boy and a girl. We had hopes of conceiving, shattered dreams through failed attempts, and the miracle of what made it despite the odds.