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Yak Max

Nothing as Big as Nutella

by yak max

I like chocolate, but the next big thing is…Nutella. Sorry to disappoint all those Tim Tam lovers out there, but Nutella is the real deal.

You can’t spread a Tim Tam on things, although you can have a Tim Tam on a slice of bread, but you can spread Nutella. You can even spread Nutella all over your body if you feel like it.

Why am I speaking about Nutella? Well you wouldn’t believe it, but I found a jumbo-sized, huge container (yes contain yourself, it’s Nutella) of Nutella in the car-park of our local Woolworths Supermarket. My parents and I were walking and talking with some acquaintances who lived nearby, and then there it was, the Nutella. Yes Rove, what the? (Rove McManus from Rove Live), a very what the? because I haven’t seen a Nutella jar so big.

It must have been an old pensioner with poor eye sight who picked up the huge Nutella container and got scared when they put on their reading glasses and found out how big it was and left it in a nice safe corner of the car park so no one else would get startled. That is where I found the Nutella jar, in the corner of the car park but next to the walk way.

Or it was a greedy little child who grabbed too many things that day, including this jumbo-sized Nutella and his stressed-to-the-eye balls mother found out he had grabbed it – ‘What were you thinking? (‘Oh I know what he was thinking, chocky, chocky, chocky’) Oh have a guess? Kids and chocolate.

I thought about taking the Nutella container home but I knew it was freakish, so, I left it. Yes it would have been a weird and wonderful thing, but I didn’t want to be called a crunchy nut-tella, tella, tell her what, that Nutella is for nutters; chocolate nutters. Oh please help us.

If someone would take a Nutella container that size home, they would be having a Nutella-phase where they would eat, sleep, shower, work, walk and run with their beloved Nutella container – ‘Oh look, it’s that Nutella nutter having a morning jog with their pet Nutella. Ha ha. ‘He he’. ‘Ha ha’.

Then it’s siunara jumbo-sized Nutella container. For a while yes, but the Nutella jar makes special appearances from time-to-time to liven up a presently down and unhappy former Nutella nutter – ‘Oh come on (this is the Nutella mind you, and yes it speaks) remember the good times we had. Don’t you just love me and my chocky, you Nutella nutter you’.

So, don’t think you are going to grab my jumbo-sized Nutella container now ok. Wait a minute, I don’t have it, I never did, I left it in the supermarket car park. But hey, get your own huge Nutella jar and be a Nutella nutter yourself.

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