The first thing that meets the eye is the physical. Males and females are attracted to what appeals to the eyes. A certain look, smile, the color of the eyes, and oh yea, how that body looks! Is he buff –showing off those six pack abs? What about her — nice butt, beautiful hair, sexy lips? The physical body can stir up powerful emotions, and like a magnet, the gravitational pulling begins.
The Gravitational Pull
Attraction is a powerful force. Extremely compelling! It seems once that magnetic force starts tugging at the emotions, the interplay of action and reaction are triggered, drawing two people closer together. From that juncture on – emotions tend to reign over reason.
The physical is just one aspect of a person. Don’t you think it’s important to determine who that compelling creature is — beyond the physical contours that attracted you– before jumping into a relationship and considering yourself to be dating? Speaking from experience and my interaction with males and females seldom is that the case and that could be a possible reason for breakups – relationships not lasting.
Two people are attracted to one another; they have a few conversations, go out a couple of times, become sexually intimate and consider themselves to be in a relationship. Months down the road they depart and someone’s heart is broken.
Granted it takes time to get to know a person, and the way to do so is to spend time together. Nevertheless, spending time together, and “choosing” to be sexually intimate doesn’t qualify as dating or a long lasting relationship.
Dating is a time to get to know a person; to determine if who two people are is compatible, share mutual values, interest and goals; if two people can be friends, enjoy one another’s company and style of fun, etc. Dating is a “finding out time”, not a “jumping into” heated emotions time.
There is a reason why attracting – attracts; however, coming to understand “what” the attraction means, takes time. Coming to understand what the attraction means requires emotions to take a back seat to patience and reasoning; when it doesn’t, there’s no dating phase, and getting to know someone can ultimately end in breakup.
Stay tune for part two!