There’s a distinct difference between love and feelings. Upon closer observation, I’m certain you will agree.
In part one I stated:
“Two people are attracted to one another; they have a few conversations, go out a couple of times, become sexually intimate and consider themselves to be in a relationship. Months down the road they depart and someone’s heart is broken.”
“Granted it takes time to get to know a person, and the way to do so is to spend time together. Nevertheless, spending time together, and “choosing” to be sexually intimate doesn’t qualify as dating or a long lasting relationship.”
Turn the Scenario Around
Relationships have a better chance of working out and lasting if the dating phase is implemented; taking time to see if the guy or gal really is into “you” and it’s more than just a physical or sexual attraction. Do you see where I’m coming from? Dating isn’t a commitment; its two people spending time to determine if their life styles and personalities mesh’ if there’s the potential for more than dating; you’re not committed to one another; both parties are free to date other people in order to make comparison.
Dating other people
Dating other people leaves room for options, variation, comparisons, choices, and for the process of elimination to be executed — who’s personality, life style, interest, etc. meshes best with yours. That’s important, especially if you’re younger and you haven’t really experienced life yet. You need to have options – it provides more insight. There are a lot of fish in the sea – you’re bound to come across a few more that you find appealing.
Key to long relationships
Neither physical appearance nor sexual attraction is the key to long lasting relationships. You’ll find that friendship covers more miles. Having someone there to support you emotionally, and stimulate you intellectually, ultimately takes precedence over physical or sexual attraction.
I’ve stated in another post that “love is something you do, not something you feel.” You can tell me you love me all day long, however, if the words aren’t backed up with deeds, sweety, I’m not falling for it.
Emotion has to do with feeling and “feeling” is what generates physical and sexual intimacy not love. A person can have strong physical and sexual feelings for another, however observe how far those feelings go if you’re never shown that your feelings matter, if the friendship and support when needed, isn’t there. Would you call that love?
Granted there’s a thin line between “love and feelings”, especially when all the main ingredients are thrown into the mix and you’re sailing along like a match made from heaven; it’s difficult to distinguish the difference. However, if you take the time to analyze and evaluate the two, I’m certain you will conclude that they are two distinct qualities.
There are people that say I love you and can’t live without you and get so angry when a breakup occurs they wind up doing bodily harm to the one they claim to love. Do you think that accounts for love or feelings? Love would never harm anyone.
Stay tune for part three!
How to distinguish the difference.