Abusive relationships manifest all over the world and in different forms.They tend to make victims feel like they are doing something wrong when, of course, they’re not. Abuse usually results in the form of physical, mental, and emotional. The abuse can even get so bad, the victim tends to become brainwashed, resulting in him or her taking years to be able to escape.
No one should have to go through an abusive relationship and sadly, some don’t know what to do in order to escape it. Victims tend to feel like they are alone, so they need to know there is a world of help and support out there for them. They need to feel lots of love and patience because getting out of an abusive relationship, sometimes, takes a long process, and it involves a lot more than getting up and walking away.
Recognize the Signs of Abuse:
Sometimes abuse doesn’t start out extreme. It can build up leading to a more dangerous situation. Being controlled, being called names, and being put down is how a lot of abuse starts. It can lead to being threatened, being beating, and being brainwashed. So if you have to do research on what the warning signs are, or if you have to talk to someone about how abuse can start, then do so.
It’s difficult for many victims to know that they have to escape being abused because some may have been abused for most of their lives. This is where they become brainwashed and think that it’s normal. Special care has to taken in order to rescue someone from abuse. They may feel like they don’t want to leave or that they can’t leave. So if you’re a witness to the warning signs get involved. Don’t turn a blind eye because the victim is in it too deeply, mentally. The fact of the matter is, they need help.
Recognize That You Need Help:
The worse thing for you to do, as a victim, is to go into denial about what’s going on. You may be in disbelief, you may feel intimidated, and you may even feel too afraid to do anything. If something inside of you is telling you “this isn’t right,” it’s time to take action.
The sad thing is when it comes to denial, victims tend to make excuses because they are too afraid, and it’s also because they don’t want anyone else to know what’s going on. They may feel embarrassed about where their relationship is going. Victims may even begin keeping to themselves, shutting themselves off from the rest of the world.
As an outsider, if the victim is in it so deeply that they can’t seem to recognize that they need help, communicate with them that what they’re experiencing is wrong. As with witnessing the warning signs, get involved. Let them know that you’re there for them, and talk to them about their abuse so they can know what to do about it. Discuss the options they have.
When you start to understand that you’re in a abusive situation, start by reaching out to friends and family. Let them know what’s going on and that you need help. If you need to, reach out to organizations that specialize in helping abuse victims. Many organizations offer shelter and protection. They will also help you start a new life as well.
A lot of victims of abuse tend to be monitored, whether physically or online by their significant other. If they have money and power, don’t dismiss the possibility that they can have others watching you as well. So when you begin making steps on leaving, don’t do it alone. Get the authorities involved, and have somebody with you at all times that can help protect you. You should have some money saved up when you begin taking steps on escaping, but if you don’t, that’s one thing organizations are for, as well as your family. They can give you food and shelter until you get back on your feet.
If children are involved, it can get even more complicated and a custody battle may ensue. The abuser will most likely try to make it seem like you’re an unfit parent in order to gain custody. If they have money and power you’re going to need everything at you’re disposal to prove that you were the victim and that you are a good parent. Start at the beginning. When you begin realizing that you’re a victim of abuse, try to get proof. Get small nanny cameras and put them at different areas of your house, starting with your bedroom. Abuse victims with children will most likely get the full brunt of abuse in their bedroom where children will not see. So make sure these cameras are working and in a good position so you can present them in court if need be.
It’s also best to have witnesses to back up everything that you’ve been going through. Doctors can testify to bruises and other injuries you may have sustained as the result of a beating. That’s why its important not to shut yourself off from the world. If others can back up your claims, you’ll have a better chance at gaining full custody of your children. They need to be safe too.
There will be plenty of emotional trauma in this case. Talking to a counselor can help you move forward with your life and help you understand that, with time, getting involved in another relationship slowly is okay to do. A counselor will help you realize that the abuse wasn’t your fault, even if you make feel like it. Anything that happened to you was because something was wrong with the abuser, not you. So be sure to talk things out with someone. Don’t keep your emotions bottled up.
Learn Self Defense:
All the time I see situations where self defense would have made a world of difference. You need to start protecting yourself, physically, so further physical abuse can be avoided. Self defense is a must. Getting a restraining order in the meantime will further add to your protection.
Relocate and Start Over:
It’s not always necessary to relocate, however, some situations are severe enough for you as the victim to move away and not look back. It doesn’t always have to be far, just far enough so that you can start a new life. When you do this, start doing things that you’ve always wanted to do but didn’t have the chance to do it. Smile, laugh, be grateful you’re no longer a victim. Remember, you don’t have to be anyone’s victim and no one has the right to make you a victim. So be strong, and always fight back. Enjoy your new life.