The party of five at Table 8 just left you a seven percent tip, and they wonder why you have an “attitude.” The real cause for the chip on your shoulder is that you are an actor, not a waiter! You’re just doing this until you get a call from your agent for your next role. You’re sure that your portfolio, which highlights the several commercials you’ve done as a hand model, will soon catch a producer’s eye. In the meantime, you do a number of tasks at CafĂ© De Lusion in Hollywood. You not only wait tables, you sometimes double as a bartender, help the owner do the books and order restaurant supplies.
As a single gal in Hollywood, you might find it easy to get dates, but perhaps you’ve decided to concentrate on young, up-and-coming actors. The reason — celebrities marry waiters more often than you think. There is no better route to a movie role than through a spouse’s connections, is there? Here are five examples of celebrity-waiter nuptials:
- The gorgeous Jennifer Lopez was married to Ojani Noa, a waiter at a Miami food joint. It was her first marriage and took place in 1997. It only lasted a year, but hey, you can meet a lot of contacts in a year. After keeping a low profile for over a decade, Ojani re-entered the celebrity scene in 2009 using his former connection to J Lo as a talking point. Reportedly there was a sex tape, but it never surfaced.
- Nicholas Cage is a legendary actor and lady’s man. He has had affairs with several celebrities, but finally settled down with Alice Kim, a 20-year-old waitress. They have been going strong for six years and have a young son named Kal-El. Super!
- While you are not close “Friends”, you may have waited on David Schwimmer and his hot waitress bride Zoe Buckman, who married after living together for five years. They’ve recently had their first child.
- Drew Barrymore makes men drool, and she had the same effect on Jeremy Thomas, a bar owner she married in 1994. It was her first marriage, intense and short. They divorced two months after the wedding. Oh well.
- Matt Damon is a popular action hero. He is happily married to Luciana Barroso, a former Miami bartender he met in 2003. The tied the knot in 2005 and now have four daughters.
It’s only a matter of time before some hot celebrity scoops you up. Till then, you’ll have to put up with seven percent tips from deadbeats like those at Table 8.