I am 25, my fiancee is 24. We are both college students and have been engaged for a year. We always planned to be together forever and wanted a baby, but didn’t expect to have it now! We are two months in the pregnancy and have already heard the heartbeat and have done a lot of impromptu growing up since we found out.
I want to share with you some advice to recently shocked parents, who had to mature and feel scared, excited, happy, and stressed all at the same time.
There is really no right time to have the baby bomb dropped unless the parents have been trying to conceive or the parents already have several children. Once shown the parallel lines on a stick, a young man turns into an adult a little everyday, transforming into a responsible father by due date, hopefully.
The initial shock is short-lived, by worry and pressure, as well as the mother’s symptoms move right in as a formidable replacement. It seems that new parents fresh out the academic oven do more planning in two months than they have up to this point.
Baby Books Galore
Very quickly, you will find yourself reading pregnancy books religiously. On one hand, some worries will be resolved and on the other, new and bigger worries will come. Self diagnosis for your baby will also be commonplace.
After shock, comes morning sickness; it seems to never go away. Your spouse no longer eats what she always had. If her favorite food was hamburgers, all meat might make her vomit. You can spend hours slaving over the stove for her just to have her be unable to keep her tummy tame.
As a father, we have to remove ourselves emotionally from how she expresses her pain. The hormones inside her are changing drastically and rapidly. She will cry because she loves you so much, then yell at you for ruining her life by burning the toast. Expect hugs and kisses to become more valuable when she has lots of symptoms.
Aside from growing up quickly, you will find yourself looking for a better job. You may change or fine-tune your career plans. Your demeanor may change to be more gentle, and you will notice other babies and might even try to interact with one from a distance.
Also, as a new father, you will have to pick up the slack of your spouse’s chores or work. It is more difficult to do a load of laundry is she is busy hugging the ceramic throne.
Most importantly, you will become a generally happier and more positive person. Stories on the evening news may disgust you more, and you may find yourself contemplating how your parents ever raised you.
The lowest points you will experience are the arguments, the sympathy symptoms for your spouse, the worry and stress, and the deep feeling of failure you may get if you happen to not get hired at a job you wanted.
The highest points will be hearing the baby’s heartbeat, joking with your spouse when she is “baby drunk” and even shedding a tear while thinking about your new family.