Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her column “Ask the Coach.”
My husband is in serious trouble with me right now and he does not even know it. He is not the one causing the troubles; it is his ex-wife, but he is part of the problem. These two divorced three years ago and my husband and I got married shortly after. We all have a good relationship, and I am even friends with the ex-wife. The problem is that she recently sold her car and now wants my husband and me to give her a ride to work every day. I was okay with this carpooling issue but lately, it has become a pain. She is always around and while in the car with us, she even wants to be part of our marriage-related conversations. My husband does not seem to be bothered with this, but I am. This situation is driving me crazy. Should I try to stop this issue or would it look like I am jealous of her presence in my husband’s life?
Dear Tashida E.,
If this situation in causing you concerns, I guess it will be time for you or your husband to tell this lady that it will best for her to either get a car or to find alternate transportation that does not involve you or your husband. It seems like you guys had a great relationship and it will be good if things could continue to be that way, especially if there are kids involved in all this. Talk to your husband and explain him what you think about the whole issue and see if he agrees with you. If he does agree, then he needs to take care of the situation for once and for all. But, If after talking to him, he does not seem to understand where is that you are coming from, then it will be time for you to make him understand that being close to his ex for the sake of the kids is one thing and allowing his ex to have a saying in his current marriage is another, and that you will not tolerate that situation anymore. Be strong and stand your grounds. The truth is that this woman needs to start living his life away from her ex; not only for her own good but also for the sake of your marriage.
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