If you asked someone from my parents’ generation who the breadwinner should be in a relationship you would probably get a sexist comment geared towards men. In today’s evolving economy, we are seeing the income disparity close between men and woman. I currently work full time for a Fortune 100 company while attempting to get my MBA, my girlfriend younger than I am, is attempting to get her degree as a nurse practitioner. I constantly get jabs from my guy friends and family telling me that I won’t be the breadwinner and I must feel inferior. I do not and here is why.
Income in a relationship is shared
When you get married or are in a long-term relationship, you share everything, including income. Younger couples like my girlfriend and I, are strapped with debt, which largely comes from student loans. When it comes to income we do not discriminate based on who the breadwinner is. Our income is split between the two of us and is used to both of our benefits, therefore, there is no jealousy over who makes more than the other does.
Men are attracted to success
About a year and a half ago when I was single, I would look for dates with potential. I was looking for someone that was motivated and career driven. I did not necessarily care about income, but I did care about their drive and motivation to be successful in their career. Guys look for someone that has drive and is self-aware of their career’s future. When it comes to income, partners that make more money do not threaten us.
Successful women do intimate us, income doesn’t
When it comes to income in a marriage or a long-term relationship, it is a great thing to find a partner that makes more than us. However, when it comes to newly dating, we do find successful women intimidating. The reason for this is we feel inferior. When we feel inferior to our date we wonder if we are saying the right thing, if we sound intelligent, or how you are judging us. While it may seem insecure, it’s a real fear that even successful men feel. However, once we open up and feel comfortable, the income factor plays virtually no role in the overall relationship.
Education levels do matter
Some jobs pay more than others do, and others get lucky in their careers, thus leading to higher income. Pay and effort don’t always correlate, some jobs just follow the supply and demand where income may not relate to the amount of work you have to do at your job. Guys do not necessarily feel threatened by a higher income earner, but we do feel threatened by someone with more education. We don’t want to feel inferior to our partner, as this can lead to several relationship problems.