Experiencing the death of a friend could be one of the most heartbreaking experiences a person could face in his/her lifetime. Losing a friend is never easy, but as hard as the experience is, you have to realize that, eventually you have to continue with your life.
In my experience as a life strategy coach, I have had the opportunity to work with some strong people who had experience this unfortunately event in their lives. Seen the way they were struggling to move on with their lives was one of the hardest things I have ever had to experience as a coach. I have to admit that the path toward recovery wasn’t an easy one for them walk through, but not an impossible one. Eventually, they did recover but only because they had the desire to close that chapter of their lives and start enjoying again what life had to offer.
If you are currently grieving over the lost of a dear friend, continue reading. Below, I will share with you five (5) excellent tips to help you cope with the pain and suffering that you may be experiencing and to use it as a motivation to get your life back on track.
Tip # 1: Give yourself time to heal, but not too much time either. Understand that it will probably take some time for you to start feeling better again, but on the other hand, you need to try, as hard as you can, to put an expiration date to your pain. The longer you take to allow the pain to go away, the longer it will take for you to get your life back. Give yourself time to heal but don’t stay in that zone for too long. Do it for you and also for the people around you because, at the end, they will be the ones paying for it.
Tip # 2: Remember the good times you spend with this friend, but don’t obsess over it. Remembering those good times you had with your friend will help you keep his/her memory alive in your life. There is nothing wrong with that. The problem starts when you become obsessed with those memories and start pushing other people out of your life because, according to you, they don’t match up to your friend. That is not a healthy way of living because at the end, you may end up all alone.
Tip # 3: Start building new memories with new friends. Once you are ready, start sharing time with your other friends and start building new memories with them. The point here isn’t to replace the memories you have, but to create new ones so that you can start having some positivism back into your life.
Tip # 4: If necessary, look for help. If after trying to move on with your life, you still feel the sadness and the emptiness, I think it may be time for you to look for help. The truth is that if the pain you are feeling is too difficult for you to handle it by yourself, you may need the help of a professional to be able to deal with it. Don’t feel bad about it. Look for help and you will see that after you do, you will start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
Tip # 5: Allow happiness back into your life. Yes, my friends. I know that not having a friend in your life is very sad but the thing is that, at the end, you will have to put that experience to the side and allow yourself to be happy again. I know that the thought of you being happy again may seem very unrealistic to you right now, but believe me; eventually, you will be happy again. You just have to allow that to happen.
The days (and even months) after losing a friend could be one of the worst time in a person’s life. The important part here is to understand that everything has a purpose and a reason in life and if God decided that it was time for your friend to go and be with him, there is nothing you could have done to prevent it. Yes, it hurts. Yes, it’s sad, but life most go on, my dear friend.
It’s time to close that chapter in your life and start looking forward. This doesn’t mean that you will forget about your friend. It means that you will honor his/her presence by moving on with your life and by not succumbing to the pain and suffering that you may be experiencing due to his/her absence.
Remember the good things you lived by his/her side but allow his soul to rest in peace by letting go of your pain. The truth is that time cures everything but a little help from us won’t hurt. Stop the suffering and embrace the joy of life; at the end, that’s what your friend may probably have wanted you to do since day one.