A tiny turtle crawled across the country road on his way to a pond on the other side. My then boyfriend and now husband, Joe, quickly scooped up the turtle and carried him across the road to safety.
Kindness to creatures such as animals is one quality every woman should look for in her future husband. If he’s kind to animals such as the baby turtle Joe rescued, then chances are he’ll be kind to humans, too. However, a man who’s cruel to animals may eventually move on to being cruel to humans.
I’ve been happily married for almost eight years now. Before that, I dated several guys on my quest to find Mr. Right. I learned to spot the red flags which could spell trouble in a relationship and to spot the signs which indicate a bright future together.
How He Gets Along With His Family
Be sure to meet his parents and other family members before getting serious in your relationship. Notice how he gets along with his parents. If he’s comfortable and relaxed around his parents, then that’s a good sign. If he gets in frequent arguments with his parents, then that’s a red flag.
Does he call his parents often if they live out of town? Does he visit them for holidays or other special occasions? If the answer to one or both questions is no, be careful. Being estranged from his parents can be another red flag unless there’s abuse involved.
Notice how he treats his mother and sisters, if he has any. How he treats them is the way he will treat you.
Watch how he gets along with the children in his life, such as nieces and nephews. A guy who’s willing to get down on the carpet and play cars with the little ones will likely make a great father to his own kids.
How He Treats Others
If your guy is sweet to you but rude to the waitress, watch out. But if he’s kind and polite to everyone he meets, then that’s a good sign.
Does he have good manners? A man who holds the door for others is showing good manners and empathy for others. But a man who’s impatient and oblivious to other people may be self-centered, rude and poor husband material.
Notice how he behaves while behind the wheel. If he honks his horn frequently or yells or swears at other drivers, be careful. Rude driving is epidemic in today’s society. However, a man who gets impatient easily and loses his temper quickly may have problems with self-control and may even be prone to violence.
How He Lives and Works
Your husband-to-be should have a steady job unless he’s still in school or was laid off through no fault of his own. Be wary of a guy who change jobs frequently. This could be a sign that he’s immature, has anger issues or has trouble getting along with others.
He should have a steady place to live unless he’s just moved to town. A man who’s lived in several different places over the past couple of years may be irresponsible or may have money problems.
Keep an eye on how well he gets along with his family and other people and how long he’s lived and worked in the same place. If you see him rescue a baby turtle, do not hesitate to say yes if he proposes to you.
Sources: My own experiences with dating.
A version of this story previously was published on Wikinut.
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