I have always said that I was born missing the girl-gene that makes girls dream of their fairy princess wedding, complete with a poofy white dress and a row of attendants. Found my Prince Charming, and I had the ring, but the big wedding still wasn’t something I wanted.
When we started planning our wedding we decided on a small, but traditional affair. We would be financing the wedding ourselves, and since neither one of us likes being the center of attention, there was no reason to plan an elaborate soirée. As the planning progressed friends and family members became more opinionated on what we should and should not do, who we should or should not invite, even what date we should get married on.
As the drama was mounting, the prospect if a wedding became something I was dreading instead of looking forward to. Finally my husband and I sat down and discussed if we wanted to continue with this plan. We decided that no matter what type of ceremony we have, we would be just as married at the end of the day. We axed the plans for a reception, dresses, even attendants. We decided we would still be married in our church, but a small, informal affair, with only our closest of friends and family. We also decided that we would get married as soon as my soon-to-be-husband could find a job in the city we would be living in after the wedding, which moved the date up by several months.
When we broke the news to our friends and family they tried to convince us that we would regret not having a “real” wedding. Our dread turned back into excitement, and we knew we had made the right decision to dial back the wedding plans.
Shortly after the decision my husband found a job, and gave his two-week notice at his current job, and wedding plans kicked into gear. We notified our pastor of the date we wanted to be married, which ended up being a Friday evening. We notified friends and family by text, Facebook, and phone calls, and welcomed anyone who wanted to join us.
The night before our wedding my brother-in-law invited some of my husband’s friends over for a night of video games, and my sister took my daughter and I out for a nice dinner.
About 40 friends and family witnessed our wedding. The ceremony was short and heartfelt, and my husband and I wore jeans. After the ceremony we invited anyone who wanted to join us to a local restaurant for a celebratory dinner.
We have now been happily married for over two years, and are proof that the marriage is what’s important, not the wedding.