You can tell a lot about how people are going to be in real life by how they are online . Private people hide behind their art or their business online . I am guilty of this. I don’t care about being professional, but I do like to control and manipulate the narrative.
Even though I have enabled privacy settings, you won’t see anything about me on the Internet I did not intend for you to see. I am not going to upload pictures to Facebook and Google that are only for certain individuals to look at.
On the other hand, you can’t tag me in photos. Not everyone on social media behaves this way. Some people share everything. Others tell us when they’re leaving a social network. We don’t need to know because we know you’ll be back. Just leave already.
I’m not going to encourage you to stay on Facebook . I may try to persuade you to try out Google Plus. Actually, I don’t do that anymore; most people that find any level of success on Facebook are not interested in other social networks. On some level it is rude for me to do so, because the real issue is not the social network. Not everything requires a technological fix.
If you’re invited to an event just say you can’t make it. I know it is tempting to say you might attend. I am routinely invited to events in other cities. But if I know I won’t attend I’ll just be frank and upfront about it.
I don’t take social media seriously. But I realize that other people do. So if you comment on what I am writing I have a responsibly to respond. I rarely ignore anyone online . Civilized, articulate discussion is welcome. Trolling, not so much.
A few words about trolling before I leave. I understand why people do it. I can see the fun in it. But you won’t experience it at my expense. I used to follow a writer online in a community where writers can post articles and earned money. Now I like to respond to people on the Internet directly. If I have a problem with someone I will send them a personal message; no need for everyone to know what our disagreements are about.
Well this particular writer wanted to carry on conversations as comments to her initial article, because she knew that the more comments she received, the more activity the site would associate with her articles and the more traffic those articles would receive.
So this writer wanted me to go back and forth in her comments section, about a discussion that was between me and that writer. Nothing that I felt a particular way about anyone else reading, but if I wanted it out there, I would have put out there.
It took me a while to figure out what was going on. I canceled my subscription to that writer’s articles, and they had already stopped responding to my content, months before that had happened. I was dealing with an provocative writer using the controversy to make money.
This is what a lot of writers do to promote themselves online . It isn’t personal, and they are simply trying to make money on the side to pay the bills. A lot of editors are on the Internet as well, as writers. They might point out the linguistic and logical fallacies in your work, but the real issue is that they disagree with what you’re saying or how you said it. They may actually be using your article to promote themselves.
Say someone disagrees with you and can appreciate the disparaging comments of the editor. Whose services do you think they’re going to solicit? This is how the Internet works. It is a fun place, but it can be cruel and unforgiving. I have developed a thick skin because of this. I used to argue with everyone. But now I know what battles are worth fighting, and which ones will cause me to contradict myself. It is not about losing a war. That mentality is self defeating. It is about figuring how to use negative energy directed towards you to your advantage. You can’t please everyone online . But you can emerge a stronger person, with better tools to deal with people offline, in the “real” world.