The internet is a wild place, and if you look, you can buy some seriously strange, awful, or unnecessary things. Here are seven of them.
Positive Pregnancy Tests
This one speaks to the questionable morals that seem to spring up along with anonymity. Women are selling used, positive pregnancy tests, and perhaps worse, there are other women buying them, likely for the reason you think they are. Sketchy.
Yes, it’s exactly what it says, milk, “pre-gargled” by “beautiful white girls.” Why the race designation? I have less of an idea of that than why someone would want pre-gargled milk in the first place. What’s that? You didn’t need to know this existed? Well, if I have to have this in my brain, so should you.
To avoid possible disappointment, this particular tank may no longer be available, but rest assured, out there, there are more sales of equipment of war to be made. Don’t worry, all buyers are highly qualified. They have internet connections.
$10,000 of currency for $45
Oh, did I forget to mention that’s $10,000 worth of shredded currency for $45? Oops, silly me. Yep, for less than $50 bucks, you can get a sack of money. Lots and lots of assembly required (actually, don’t try to assemble it, unless you’re in it for the challenge. It’s never been monetized, and thus isn’t worth anything).
Beads? No Bees!
Look out Gob Bluth, because you’re not the only one who can offer bees as gifts. Although you should probably ask before you make someone an involuntary beekeeper. It’s the perfect site for anyone who has dreamed of having a hive of his own.
“Yes, Milord,” is what people will be saying to you after you’ve sprung just under $50 bucks to join the noble gentry as a Lord, Lady, Baron or Baroness of the post-stamp self-proclaimed Prinipality of Sealand. With higher aspirations and $335, you could be a Count or Countess. Who says we’ll never be royals?
A Huge Toblerone
What is the internet for if not for ridiculously-sized portions of delicious chocolate? Head to Amazon for a Toblerone candy bar weighing nearly 10 lbs. It also costs $166, which would buy you a whole bunch of less-amusingly sized ones. But still, at that price, they may sell out, so grab it now. Sadly, it’s not Prime eligible, so shipping’s on you.