“Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say goodnight ’til it be morrow.”
On second thought, Pookie, this was our first vacation together … what say we make it our last?!
My boyfriend and I had set out on a nice long drive from Pittsburgh to Ohio. We’d been dating for half a year, it was a beautiful weekend, and this was to be our first vacation as a couple. A weekend at an amusement park. Two days all alone together. Two long, continuous, unceasing days, always together. I was always at the amusement park. He was always at the amusement park. We were not amused. That’s right, we couldn’t even handle two measly days together. Where in blazes did we go wrong?
I’ve read one article after another entitled, Surviving Your First Vacation as a Couple, and let me give you my first piece of advice: Stop thinking about it as ‘surviving.’ It’s supposed to be fun! It’s supposed to be a time for building your relationship, not simply surviving it! When I look back on that fateful weekend, the two days that became the beginning of the end for me and the man I loved, I realize a few things I did wrong and how I can avoid these pitfalls in the future.
Perhaps a dirty word to some, compromising is simply being respectful of each other. It’s the cornerstone of a lasting relationship. Hey, this is a vacation! It’s not a time to dig in your heels or make a statement or get the upper hand (like I did). Try looking at it like you want to make this the best vacation for the other person. If you take the focus off yourself, you’ll be surprised how good this time alone together will be for your relationship. And if ‘compromise’ is, indeed, a dirty word to you, maybe you’re not ready for a relationship anyway.
Go with your strengths
Okay, I read this one in various articles, and I cannot stress how much I vehemently agree with it. In every relationship, one person is good at some things, while the other is good at other things. A vacation is a bad time to try to strengthen your weaknesses. You both have strengths. Run with them, work together, and things should go much more smoothly.
If all else fails … fail
This is definitely one I haven’t read anywhere else. Okay, it’s not ‘romantic,’ but it is sound and realistic advice. If you find that you’ve compromised, respected, and run with your strengths all over the place and your first great vacation together still is dying an agonizing death, maybe this relationship isn’t meant to be, and you should just go your separate ways now. I’m serious! How much time and money have you invested in this vacation? How long will it be before you can take another vacation? If your answers to these questions are akin to ‘too much’ and ‘too long,’ then perhaps you should just sit down together, look deep into each other’s eyes, and say, “Here’s your plane ticket, Pookie … have a nice life!”