Has it been a while since you had someone special in your life? Do you long to call someone your boyfriend and in turn be a girlfriend to a quality guy? I am happy to tell you that it will happen if you keep on trying. Keep on reading and follow the formula that worked for me.
- 1. Keep a positive attitude. I know that you have heard this a million times but REALLY, hope for the best and it will happen. How would you act if you know that next week you will meet that special someone who you can cuddle with several times a week and look into your eyes with so much love? You will feel great right? Well, keep on living your life right now and it is just a matter of time before you meet that guy who you click with.
- 2. Keep on socializing and going to events. Online dating is a great way to meet people but it just feels like you are a commodity that people are choosing from. I am sure that it has worked wonderful for a lot of couples out there, but it is also not to the advantage of some. If you fall in a category that is sort of “special” or beyond a certain parameter, it will be to your benefit to meet people “in person.” Face-to-face contact with people enjoying the same interests not only lowers the pressure, but it also allows you to be more yourself, have fun and best of all, know on the spot if there is chemistry. Go to mixers, networking and similar events. Before you know it, you will have a couple of guys texting, emailing or asking you out.
- 3. Keep an open mind but know when to opt out. A lot of us have checklists of what we are looking for in a partner. But before you cross out someone and decide not to spend more time with him, rethink it. Give someone a little bit more time and it is very much possible that you may find a “diamond in the rough.” Give nerds and geeks a shot too because they are totally underestimated and can be the greatest boyfriend of all. I recommend cutting of someone who is verbally and physically abusive and who puts you down. It may take time for a guy to decide to commit but if he keeps on saying, “I am just here to have fun” and is proud to be “player”, his drinking ways and a “bar fly”, do both of you a favor and let him continue partying WITHOUT YOU.
- 4. Be generous and be an asset to a guy. Guys are afraid of “gold diggers” so to appease that fear, be generous with the guy you like. Know the balance of letting him treat you like a lady but do reciprocate as well and pay for a meal here and there, or even buy him something that he needs but do not have the time to purchase. The best relationship is that of a give and take and where both parties are more than happy to make the other person feel cared for and appreciated. Make sure that you also show him how lucky he can be with you in his life. Don’t be narcissistic or be overly full of yourself, but it will do wonders to let him realize how valued you are by your friends, family and how much you kick ass at your career. Marketing your value and what you have to offer not only works in business but also in love.
- 5. Be nice and caring. Guys like someone who is good to them and someone who hears them out after a long day at work. If you help take the stress off his day and put a smile in his face, then you are off to a good start. Check on him here and there but DO NOT overdo it and allow him to wonder what you are up to and miss you a little bit. Having some mystery does wonders. If he feels some fear that there may be some competition, he will “up his game”. Let him know if he makes you happy and compliment him for good behavior. He will feel more drawn towards you.
- 6. Do not sleep with him too soon. This is old school and I am sure there are exceptions but your chances of becoming his girlfriend will increase if you do not allow him to treat you like a booty call. Do not let him start seeing you only for sex, or asking you to go home after being intimate at his place. Make him get used to the fact that you are staying over. Ensure also that he takes you out on dates and does not only see you when he wants to mess around. Put your foot down and let him know that treating you like a casual chick simply won’t work.
- 7. Make sure you are on the same page or know where he is at. After a couple of dates, you will probably know whether there is potential that you will be his girlfriend. If a committed relationship is what you want and that is not his intention, you may have to walk after some time. If you feel like still seeing a couple of guys and he suddenly refers to you as his “girlfriend” then whoa! Make sure you clarify his expectations and definition of what you are to him. If he expects exclusivity, then you will need to make a choice to keep on seeing other men or to cut everyone else and commit to this bold one who took the plunge for the start of a happily ever after.
- 8. Do not panic and sabotage the relationship. Believe it or not, girls can be commitment phobic too. I am sure you have heard about the “runaway bride.” If you are a little fearful of being in a monogamous relationship or simply cannot believe that after all the jerks you have met, you landed a wonderful guy, just take a deep breath and relax. Be grateful of this gift and your luck that finally, you have an awesome guy that you can call YOURS. Yay!
- 9. After some time, ask if he loves you. This is one of the best validations of being a girlfriend, hearing those sweet words. Once he spills those words, he is definitely yours and this is FOR REAL. You can also confirm with him when your “official anniversary date” is because that will seal it off that you guys are an item. Then you have the option to be one of those mushy couples who celebrate every month. If you are in love, you guys will be more than happy to do that.
- 10. Be careful with his heart and ego. Be conscious of what you convey with your actions. Follow the golden rule, if it will hurt and offend you, give enough care not to do it to him. Even if you make more money, treat him with respect and appreciate what he accomplishes day to day. Men get weird with their egos and will not have a problem dumping you if you if you make him feel small. Do not even go there. Treat him like a king and he in turn will treat you like a princess or his queen.
Once it happens, be grateful that you found love. Love is a universal need. Whatever façade people have, everyone longs to find that special someone. It can be challenging and may take some time, so when you finally find one, treat him like GOLD. Protect a man’s heart, the same way you would care for yours. When you are finally girlfriend, just enjoy the ride. Keep smiling because he may be your ONE.