Many parents are not aware of the negative impact that divorce has on their kids. Many kids hide their feelings about the split from their parents and some may feel as if there is no use to communicate with their parents because they are so wrapped up in themselves. This causes them to not be honest with their parents about how upset they are about the divorce. Many kids are devastated by the divorce and may even blame themselves.
A lot of times parents think that their kids are coping fine with the divorce. Parents even think that their kids are relieved that they had left their partner. However, overtime, parents begin to see their kids act out by participating in destructive activities, such as drinking alcohol, doing drugs, and even self-harm. Some kids even go as far as commit suicide.
Even though parents can’t make their children’s hurt go away, they can help them cope with the disappointments. The following are some suggestions that parents can use to help their children better cope with the divorce:
– Parents should encourage their children to communicate. When a child is able to communicate, it helps to ease their frustrations and gives them a sense of empowerment. By expressing themselves, they know that their feelings really do matter to their parents.
-If a parent misses a visitation day, it is important that the other parent plan a special and fun activity, such as a zoo or amusement park trip. This helps divert the disappointment of their parent not showing up. It is important to also allow the kids to be able to express themselves. Don’t downplay the pain and sadness that they feel.
-Children should always know that they are loved. Parents should always stress to their children that their other parent loves them even if they don’t stick to their word. For example, if a parent cancels an outing to the zoo, the other parent should reassure the child that they are still loved and that adults make mistakes.
– Parents shouldn’t fight in front of their kids. Any disagreements should be discussed over the phone and away from the kids, no matter whether it is about child support or unreliability. Arguing in front of the kids, causes kids to not adjust to the divorce as easily.