High heels are all the rage among society women these days, as they increase a person’s height, emphasize the buttocks, and are generally considered stylish, although I tend to think most women generally find them an unpleasant reminder that the media, magazines, and TV shows set an unrealistic standard of human beauty today. Also a continuous thorn in the side of many women is the world’s misguided notion that they need to look like skeletons in order to be considered beautiful. How do I know this? I talked to a lot of women in my time; none of them liked sore backs, squashed toes, and their butts sticking out for all the world to see, unless they were looking to attract attention in which case they were fine with it, but I digress.
Let’s get back to the supposed weight and figure issue plaguing our female population. Most women end up with a so-called weight condition characterized by a swelling of the stomach after eating sizable amounts of carbohydrates, which I personally find deliciously enticing, especially pastries. Hmmm, now I’m hungry. Where’s that doughnut a had lying around…? Anyway, a lot of women expend enormous amounts of time and energy watching their weight to avoid this, even though most don’t realize the only thing they have to do is stand up straight and leave the high heels at home. Wearing high-heels causes the stomach to stick out as much as any other part, especially when you’re trying to stand up straight. By wearing shoes with less than two inches of heel, posture returns to normal and by standing up straight you can appear to weigh less and stand taller.
Shop for shoes: Footsmart.com
Some women have larger bellies without wearing high heels. I say “who cares?” Men don’t care if you look like a supermodel, as long as you’re healthy and pretty. Supermodels look like the walking dead and probably feel like it too, considering the modeling profession is stricken by explosive bulimia and laxative addictions. One thing the movie producers don’t tell you is movie-stars don’t look that good on camera without twenty beauticians working on them every two hours.
Shop for shoes: Smithsshoes.com
Doctors have discovered links between high heels and plantar-fasciitis, that being a straining of the muscles along the soles of the feet, severe back pain, and spinal damage. Not to mention the strain on the legs, the nerve clusters in the feet, and a the heels unexpected breaking causing an embarrassing lopsided walking pattern. Ladies, I thought the idea was to feel empowered, not cause yourselves more pain.
And finally, who cares if you’ve got a little extra in the front anyway? A real man won’t give the money back after winning the lottery just because the bag is heavy, he’s going to spend it any way he likes, or any way his wife likes more like. And going through all that pain just to be a few inches taller is pretty insane if you ask me. Men don’t care how tall a woman is, so long as they fit their individual preference of beauty; and they don’t care if they like to eat, neither. Hell, in my book one of the top 10 sexiest things a woman can do is eat. Coincidentally, I like cooking. Lunch anyone?