Having a sibling can be tough growing up, depending on your relationship with them. My sister and I were always fighting, arguing and never seemed to get along. Once we got older and I went off to university, things changed and we could really hang out and talk to each other as siblings, but it does make you think back at all of the things you have learned from having a sibling. Here are five important things I have learned from having a sibling.
1. Lying Stinks
When push came to shove, my sister would always want revenge on me if I had gotten the better of her. Sometimes, even when she was bored, she would want to cause some trouble. This is where lies came in; my sister was very good at lying and has never been caught, even to this day. She would tell our parents of something that I had apparently done and then I’d have to face repercussions of it. This sent me on a downward spiral because, if she suddenly made up a lie that I had smacked her in the arm, in my mind I’d be getting trouble for it anyway so I then carried out the task. Not the best way of dealing with it, I assure you, but I was young. This may have impressed upon some people that lying will get you your way, but to me, it made me hate lying and I made sure to stick to the true sides of a story even when I wasn’t believed.
2. The Youngest Always Wins
It’s not always like this but, from my experience, that is definitely the way it felt. Even when my younger sister was in the wrong, it was always my fault for arguing with her or for rubbing it in. Sometimes, when it isn’t worth the trouble, letting it go can be the best thing to do. It works like this in the business world as well; if you are a manager, making an issue with your workers isn’t always the best thing to do. If you want results to look good yourself, then you need to motivate them to work rather than tell them they are wrong, which would inflict more pressure and bad reports on yourself. Being a manager means that anything that goes wrong in your department will come back and fall on your head. When reprimanding people, this won’t look good to other workers and will cause more issues down the line. Like the youngest always wins, the lower downs will also have their way.
3. Don’t Retaliate
When my sister and I would have fights, it would mainly be due to her teasing me and winding me up. When she would do this, I would retaliate in a way that would cause an argument or make the wars begin. Retaliation is what would typically catch me out because, when I was younger, it would be her annoying me and, when I retaliated, I would be the one who gets in trouble. When I look back now, I realize that it wasn’t that big of a deal and I could have let it slide. If it was really getting to me, then I could have just mentioned it to someone. In the grand scheme of things, it does teach you that in later life when things annoy you and get you down that getting angry isn’t a good way of dealing with it.
4. Sharing is Rewarding
Sharing was always something that was enforced by parents when we were kids, to let each other share a certain toy or some food. I was very accustomed to my sister measuring which cup of juice had more in it so that it became hers. In the long run, sharing isn’t always as one sided as it seems, it has now taught me that everyone is the same and, by giving a little, it could actually be a lot. If my sister ever needs money, I don’t mind lending it to her at all; I know I will get it back and I know for certain she would do the same for me. This isn’t false trust or makes it so you trust people easily but it does allow you to see who your true friends are and who you can do this with as well. Not always with money but with things in everyday life.
5. Trust is Important
Even when there are so many wrong doings between you and your siblings, it is always important to know that you can trust them. When arguing with a sibling or fighting with them, you know that if an emergency arises that you could forget your differences. Fights are in the moment and they teach you that you can forgive and trust that, if you are in need, the other person doesn’t actually hate you as convincing as it may seem in an argument. Now I trust my sister a lot and I can talk to her about nearly anything and I know that if I needed her, she would be there for me and drop everything to do so. Even if our childhood was rocky, that might have even helped develop our sibling bond to a stronger standard.
I do have a lot of positive and negative experiences with my sister but I do feel that it has made me a better person and developed me for the world. Having a sibling versus being an only child makes me feel like an only child would miss out on learning a lot of boundaries and life lessons from not having a sibling. I think these lessons have made me a better person as a whole and I have learned from my own experiences that you can’t trust what a child is saying unless you see it for yourself. I think when I finally become a parent, I will be able to retain the knowledge I have and make sure that when their siblings come along that they learn the same lessons and knowledge that I have gained.