Computers used to take up a whole room; how did they manage to get into the room with such a big thing as that inside –
‘My face is squashed here’.
‘Whatever you do, don’t go to the toilet. You might make a leak, it lands on the big computer and you would cop an almighty electrocution’.
Then experts and people said we wanted it to be smaller. Quick grab the Munchkins (Wizard of Oz) and Oompa-Loomas (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory), with a special appearance from Mini-Me (Dr. Evil, Austin Powers) and do a big dance made by small people.
These days they have small things in the palm of your hand like mobile phones and tablets, not tablets like medication, although you will need tablet medication (ok ok it comes in liquid and powder too) looking at those computer screens for too long; and also things from bargain stores.
Those bargain stores have all sorts of small knick-knacks. What are knick-knacks? Knick-knacks is a word made by someone who liked a lot of small things, and are probably bored of these small knick-knacks and now want big knick-knacks –
‘Hey, I’m sorry, but knick-knacks are only meant for small things, not big things; what is going on here?’
‘Well look here you; I can call you you if that’s alright? Grab out the dictionary because there is a new revised version coming, that says knick-knacks also include big things as well. You got it?
‘Big things as well hey? Ok, how about you try and put that computer as big as a room and put it in your back-pack you have over there and bring it to a class near you. You wanted big, then have it big’.
‘You might have an idea there. A lot of things are small these days. Where has all the big stuff gone? Perhaps, let’s think here, think big thoughts for a big idea. The big computer, big car, even a big house, can fit in your suitcase or back-pack (oh this is good, ha ha, please keep talking, we’re listening – he’s off the planet) and you can take it out and use it anywhere anytime you want.’
‘Ah mate, excuse me, how do you expect everyone in the class to get some work done here when your big computer, which you somehow took out of that small back-pack there, has taken up the whole room and squashed the students faces against the wall of the room, like a morning and late afternoon city train.’
This looks like a job for a magician of some sort, like Kris Angel or Peter Powers, or that guy from Tricked. First it used to be pulling a rabbit out of a hat, now it’s pulling a big computer or something big of that nature out of a bag – ‘What on Earth, if it is from Earth, is that? You don’t think that neat magic trick is going to allow you to use that around here now do you?’
It’s like a hidden mathematical equation isn’t it, big, small, big/big, big, small/small, small, big –
‘Ok, ok, we get the message, not the mathematical message mind you.’
‘Or do you get the message, punk?’
I’m sure a lot of equations went into making a big computer and the like that fit into a bag. Good luck with that Mr. and Mrs. So and So. Mr. and Mrs Smith (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie), stay out of this please.