Being an addict of self improvement I have seen both negative and positive sides of the process. Self improvement can be exhilarating and open your eyes to who you can be and what you can do, but it also can be a battle with low self esteem and self worth. Depression is one of the main reasons why I can’t fulfill a goal. The whole “you’re not good enough and you never will be” thing really tends to nip at your confidence. So how do you get out of the lowest point of your life when your confidence isn’t as strong as it could be?
First, know your limits when it comes to getting family and friends involve with your goals. Lets face it, sometimes we fail, it happens. Whether you’ve been on a diet for three weeks and during a weak moment you downed an entire container of double fudge ice cream or you’ve have been looking for a job for four months and have had no luck, nothing is more degrading than a family member saying “Hey, how’s that goal you were working on?” It’s best to avoid telling people who have or might possibly give you a pep talk about where your life is going because usually if you slip up it’s another trigger to an eye rolling pep talk.
Second, be realistic. If you haven’t exercised in three years don’t expect your body to be able to do 100 squats on the first day. We all have our limits and the longer you’ve been in this rut the bigger your limits are. When you are dealing with mental illnesses like anxiety and depression sticking to your goals can be that much harder so when you are starting out have easy goals to stick to. Lets say you are trying to find a job, instead of having one goal to find a job, split it into several goals like fill out five applications, rock your interviews, and then get a job. You never want to put too much pressure on yourself because when you fail the person that will be disappointed the most is yourself.
Third, never give up! Don’t worry, you are not alone. As a matter of fact, I am probably the biggest quitter I know. You’ve been working on the same goal for a century and you are still at square one. Quitting will be easier then following through and you’ve had about as much as you can take but guess what? Goals are never easy! If they were, we wouldn’t even need goals to begin with. So when you are feeling like you can’t take another second without chocolate or you can’t take another one of those mind-numbing questionnaires that come with most applications suck it up and show yourself who is boss.
And the most important rule to going through with your goals is to have faith. Find that person within yourself that thinks you are awesome and let them take over for a bit because you’ll never be able to complete a goal if you never had any faith to begin with.