Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her column “Ask the Coach.”
One of my good friends just told me that she is in love with my brother and that she wants to date him. I do not think she should be getting herself involved with my brother (who happens to be much younger than she is), but she feels that I am overreacting. According to her, my brother also has feelings for her. I have not confronted my brother yet about this because I usually do not get involved in his life, but this particular situation is getting me upset. I love my friend but I know she could be a little “easy” with the boys sometimes and I do not want my brother to get caught in her mess. Should I talk to my brother about this and explain him why I am so against him dating this person?
The Concerned Sister
Dear Concerned Sister,
If this situation is really preventing you from sleeping at night, I will suggest you to go ahead and have a chat with your brother. When you talk to him make sure you explain him with details why is that you think he should not be getting himself involved with this friend of yours. When you do this, you have to try to pass the message to him in a non-emotional way so he can see where is that you are coming from. You said in your email that he is much younger than your friend is, but you did not say how much younger. If he is 18 and up, he is considered an adult and you may have to understand that either you like it or not, it is his life and he can do with it whatever he wants. He may be, in fact, having feeling for this person and if that is the case, you may have to just step to the side and allow him to live his life the way he wants. Unfortunately, as much as you would like to “protect” your brother from this kind of stuff, the truth is that, at the end, he will do whatever he think is right for him and if dating your “easy” friend is something that he wants to do, he will do it with your approval or without your approval.
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