Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her column “Ask the Coach.”
My entire life, I have been very close to my older sister. She has been there for me in moments that I did not have anyone else, and I love her with all my heart. I got married two years ago and soon after that, I had my first baby. My sister (who is still single) is his godmother, and she does a great job helping me to take care of him. The problem that I have with her is that she seems too involved in my child’s life, and I do not think that her behavior is healthy for him or for her. My husband thinks we should tell her to take it easy but I do not want to do something that could make her feel like we do not appreciate what she has done for us and for our son. Do you think if I tell her how I fell, she will get offended? What is the best way to bring this to her attention without hurting her feelings?
If you think that your sister’s behavior is not healthy, then you need to talk to her about it. When you do, just explain her how is that you feel and why you think her behavior is not healthy. Maybe she is just trying to help and she does not realize that she is just helping a little too much. On the other hand, she may be using your son to fill an empty hole in her life. If that is the case, then you need to bring that to her attention and see if she gets the message. The truth is that this is your son and if even your husband is starting to have an issue with it, you need to do something to help the situation to get better not only for your sister, who needs to think more about her life than about your son, but also for your son, who may not understand why his aunt is so involved in his life. When you talk to her, just be nice about it and make sure you also listen to what is that she has to say. That, I think is the best way to fix this situation without hurting her feelings or doing something that you may regret later on.
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