Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her column “Ask the Coach.”
After spending a couple of years in the military, I decided to move back with my parents for a while. Everything was cool at the beginning but all of the sudden, my dad started treating my mom very badly. He would scream at her, treat her like a slave, and even pushed her once. I was very surprised with this because he never treated her that way before. I asked mom what was going on and she said that he has been treating her like that for a while now and she does not know why. I am not a very big fan of my dad and never had a good relationship with him, but I never saw him mistreating my mom. I am having a hard time dealing with it. The other day when he pushed her, I got up and pushed him back and things got a little out of control that my mom had to ask me to leave the house for a while so I could calm down a little bit. I am very upset with him for treating my mother like this and do not know what I should do to fix this. I love my mom and cannot think about leaving her with him under these circumstances.
The Concerned Son
Dear Concerned Son,
I guess is time for you to have a very serious conversation with this man and make him understand that you will not tolerate that behavior anymore. I honestly don not know why this is happening but I surely know that it has to stop and there are laws that protects you mom. If after talking to your dad, he continues treating your mom badly, I guess it will be time for you and your mom to get the police involved before it is too late. If this man is, in fact, treating your mom that way, he needs to be held accountable for his actions. No one deserves to be treated that way and what concerns me is that if he did that in front of you, what else is he doing when you are not around? You also need to talk to your mom and explain her that she needs to stand up for herself and not allow him to treat her that way. The issue here is that she may be scared and may never do it and that is why you need to support her and make sure you do something to make the abuse to stop; even if it means to press charges for domestic abuse against him. Maybe that will be the only way this situation will come to an end for once and for all.
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