Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her new column “Ask the Coach.”
I was engaged to this man, and after I found that that he was cheating on me with a co-worked, I decided to break up the engagement and move back with my parents (we living together at that time). At the beginning of the break-up, he tried to apologize to me and did many crazy things to get me to take him back. I never paid attention to him and apparently, because he wasn’t getting what he wanted, he started looking for attention in a different way. This time, he started talking trash about me to our friends. One of the things he said about me was that I had also cheated on him in the past and that he forgave me, and because of that, I should forgive him. The thing is that he’s lying. I have never cheated on him. Now, I realized that I don’t want anything to do him again in my life; I don’t even want him near me anymore. The problem is that I’m afraid that he will continue spreading these rumors about me to the point that people will start believing them.
Marisol from Pensacola
Dear Marisol from Pensacola,
The best suggestion I can give you is not to play his game. He’s obviously looking for attention and if you start reacting to every single lie he tells your friends, he’ll feel accomplished. Ignore him as much as you can and believe me, eventually, he’ll get tired. In the mean time, talk to your friends and explain them what’s going on so they know where is that he’s coming from. If your friends are smart, they’ll realize right away what the real issue is. Your ex is just bitter because you broke up with him, and believe me; bitterness is a very difficult thing to hide. Again, just ignore him and continue moving forward with your life. Don’t allow him to get in the way of your pursuit of happiness. He had his chance with you and didn’t appreciate it. Now, let him face the consequences of his mistakes. The sad part about all this is that, If he continues with the lies, soon he’ll end up with no friends whatsoever.
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