Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her new column “Ask the Coach.”
I am a recently divorced woman whose ex-husband had the great idea of starting to date my next-door neighbor. I am not sure if they were having a relationship before we divorced or what, but now, they are seeing each other. It bothers me that he is doing this with this person knowing that I live door to door with her. There have been times when I have seen him coming out of her apartment at night and it drives me insane. I am not jealous or anything. In fact, I am dating someone else as well. What really bothers me is that he knows I don’t like this person and even knowing that, he decided to date her right in front of my nose. I think he is being very insensitive with the whole thing. Am I being too emotional here? Should I just ignore it and continue with my life?
The Door to Door Neighbor
Dear Door to Door Neighbor,
The answer to your question is “yes.” I think you should ignore them. This sounds like your ex is trying to make you jealous. Maybe, he is jealous of the relationship that you have and wants to show you how happy he is without you. Don’t let him get to you. If you show him that you are upset, he will continue messing with you. Once he realizes that the relationship he has with your neighbor doesn’t bother you, he will probably stop the act and continue with his life. On the other hand; if their relationship is genuine, well; let them enjoy it without allowing that to get on your way. If you guys have no plan to get back together, he can date whoever he wants; and unfortunately, if your neighbor is available; there is nothing you can do to prevent him from dating her if that is what he really wants to do. What you need to do is to stop worrying about them and start enjoying your life with that special person in your life. But, if it really bothers you seeing your ex with your neighbor, consider moving. Maybe that way, you will get to live a happy life without having to deal with your ex anymore.
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