Need a quick answer to a career or personal dilemma? Career and life coach Marielys Camacho-Reyes will answer your concerns in her column “Ask the Coach.”
I have been friends with this guy for almost five years now. We met when we were in high school and our friendship continued after that. We have had some great times together and to be honest with you, he is a very special person in my life. I have to mention that we are just friends. The problem I have is that lately, he has been “very busy” at work and we do not hang out as often as we used to. When I call him to see if he wants to come over, he always has a silly excuse not to come. I really miss him and it hurts my feelings that he does not want to spend time with me anymore. I am not sure what is going on with him, but I think that he is trying to avoid me and that is why every time I call him, he looks for excuses not to see me. I really want him back in my life, but do not know what to do to make things better between us. Any idea what is happening with him?
The Forgotten Friend
Dear Forgotten Friend,
For me, it would be very difficult to know why your friend is acting the way he is acting. What I can tell you is that, if you want to get to the bottom of this, what I would suggest you to do is to have a nice chat with him and see if you can get him to tell you what is really going on. The fact that he does not want to spend time with you as often as he did, seems to me that something is happening in his life that is “preventing” him from spending time with you and as his friend, it is your responsibility to try to find out what the reasons are. I will say, go ahead and tell him that you guys need to have a serious conversation and see how he reacts to that. If after asking him to talk to you about the reasons for his indifference toward you, he does not give you a straight answer and continues to behave the same way he has been behaving, then I guess it will be time for you to step to the side and let him be. The truth is that, as much as you would like things to be the same as they were before, if he is not willing to do the same, then there is not much you can do other than move on with your life.
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